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There are a select few who know me for who I am.

They know my body language.
They know my deepest concern.
They know my hearts true desire.
They know the struggles that I go through.
They know the burdens I carry.

They are people, whom I call friends. They know me without reading this very blog, because we converse in-person.

Today, I chose to be somebody else. Long story short, we had a guest speaker to give us a session in voice training. However, there is a greater emphasis in audible performance, something which I struggle with, purely because I have been disheartened of folk role-playing an extrovert.

We were encouraged to perform, as we read the Scriptures and fixate our tones on select words. If you want an audible performance of the Holy Scriptures, I would suggest investing time and money in a good quality audiobook of the Bible. After all, it is edited to perfection!

For me, I typically read the Scriptures and I never give eye contact. There are four situations that occur when God’s Word is spoken out loud.

  1. The listener may choose to look at the speaker and observe him or her speaking God’s Word.
  2. The listener may choose to follow the spoken Word, provided that both parties (listener and speaker) are using the same bible translation.
  3. The listener may choose to depend on the tech team to display Scripture as a PowerPoint, out of sheer convenience.
  4. The listener may choose to close their eyes, and either try to visualise it, or simply to discipline themselves to focus on God’s Word.

I myself have done all four.

However, I chose to give vague eye contact, whilst squinting at the Bible, despite wearing my nerdy glasses. I recognise that I should have gone to Specsavers, but in the realm of public speaking, I would have a super-large print of my selected passage of Scripture for reading out loud. Ideally, I strive to read from a physical bible. Nothing beats a traditional copy of a finely made bible, especially beautiful gilted Indian paper.

Anyhow, the moment I spoke before a class on Matthew 7:7-12 in an audible performance, my mind immediately drew blank. My body posture sloped at a ridiculous angle, and I quickly discovered my voice fell in volume. I slurred a bit, and I out-paused myself because I used a bit of paper to help guide my eyes to the selected line, which I have not done since elementary school.

Rule No. 1 – When you are expecting a reply via a text message. NEVER read the reply, until AFTER any form of public speaking. My mind was gone, as I was thinking of a friend today.

Rule No. 2 – Be yourself!

I have learned of two things today. One is that the human mind is incredibly powerful. Do we really have the power to control what can possibly affect us? I’m not too convinced.

However, I do appreciate a friend who can talk to you in-person, and encourage and remind you to be yourself, especially when God created us uniquely, which makes me want to briefly reflect on one final thing… I have critics who expect me to jump hoops and do certain things, as to ‘tick the boxes’ that would artificially give a seal of approval, which actually brings no value to me.

I do know however, the LORD has already been nurturing me (in His perfect timing) into a place, where He has given me itchy feet. I am not called to travel overseas, nor am I to be someone else (in calling or character), or even to pursue something I no longer have passion in, but the LORD is definitely calling me to be courageous. And that is all I shall say for now.

~Richard